Funniest Puns and Jokes (Pun of the Day)

Funny puns - as voted by visitors to this site.
11. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Tori -
4.1 stars
12. When notes get in treble, bass-ically they get put behind bars. The alto-nate punishment is to push them off a clef and hope they land flat on sharp objects.
Allan Cao - Canada
4.1 stars
13. If there was someone selling drugs in this place, weed know.
nkabc5 - EL Centro CA
4.1 stars
14. The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
Kady - NC
4.1 stars
15. A man just assaulted me with milk, cream and butter. How dairy.
Tom - UK
4.1 stars
16. A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence. 4.1 stars
17. He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends. 4.1 stars
18. I used to be a banker but I lost interest 4.1 stars
19. I don't trust these stairs because they're always up to something.
LEP DOG - south Africa
4.1 stars
20. It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
reif - hawaii
4.1 stars

Vote for pun number:
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Excellent