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Listing puns for JA

1. Benny was sure that if he had to he could master braille once he got a feel for it. 3.7 stars
2. After the six campers were discovered missing from their tents the state police began to canvas the area. 3.1 stars
3. Before King Arthur appointed a knight to give acupuncture treatments at Camelot Sir Lancelot knew he was stuck with the job. 2.9 stars
4. The first fish to gather in schools was the grouper. 3.3 stars
5. I've never really known what I wanted to do in my later years, but in the long run, I want to take part in the Boston Marathon. 3.0 stars
6. Mimes are determined to remain silent, to say the least. 3.6 stars
7. The stern pirate captain's policy of forcing the worst members of his crew to walk the plank went swimmingly. 3.0 stars
8. My job as head chef at a top rated restaurant is in jeopardy because my latest culinary creation was called a recipe for disaster. 2.4 stars
9. Doctor Frankenstein's creation was a man of many parts. 3.0 stars
10. When the money fell from my pocket I saw this punk reach for it, pointed my .357 Magnum at him and muttered, 'Go ahead, take my pay.' 2.7 stars
11. Trying to steel himself, Al attempted to iron out his business problems but was a little bit rusty. 3.0 stars
12. Tony attempted to join his thin crust pizza company with Zimo's Thick Crust Pizza, but somehow it didn't pan out. 2.8 stars
13. I'll admit to not being much of a plumber so when I tried to repair my toilet I couldn't get a handle on it. 3.0 stars
14. A rise in mercury sometimes mars life on earth, how else would nature planet? 3.1 stars
15. Sawyer was a carpenter and often counter productive. 3.1 stars
16. The key to the success of all musicians of note is their ability to stay composed while performing at a level that can't be beat. 3.5 stars
17. We've missed our favorite tea at the Chinese restaurant where we often dine, but we've been getting oolong. 2.9 stars
18. Cheddar is as Gouda cheese as any American could wish for, and while we Edam all that is something one could never Provolone. 3.0 stars
19. All my children were young and restless when they received the daze of their lives that sent them to General Hospital. 2.9 stars
20. When the detectives on the police force observed suspects dining in the city's best restaurant, it was their favorite steak out. 3.2 stars
21. Most state laws don't give a thumbs up to hitch-hikers. 3.1 stars
22. I know an eager-beaver District Attorney who ferreted out how someone badgered a politician into weaseling out of a contract on a rabbit farm. 3.1 stars
23. After that poisonous snake struck at me in the Arizona Desert I was really rattled. 3.2 stars
24. It was a sad day for the rattlesnake family, the time had come for the children to strike out on their own. 3.0 stars
25. In times like these the value of Chinese currency should make Americans pay attention. Instead, too many of us just yuan. 2.5 stars
26. A shark can be a dangerous fish, make no bones about it. 2.4 stars
27. Is it true that several of the justices on the Supreme Court refer to their homes as 'legal pads'? 3.2 stars
28. He was the most dishonest and cleverest card shark in the city, the police said he will be dealt with. 3.0 stars
29. When just one prisoner working on a gang on a country road attempted to escape there was a chain reaction. 3.1 stars
30. I thought I was investing in sea-going vessels when I bought those Chinese junk bonds. 2.9 stars
31. The great chef put in much thyme while learning his craft in Amsterdam - he likes to call them his 'Holland days.' 3.2 stars
32. Anyone should know how to put a saddle on a horse so it won't slip and cause an injury. It's a cinch. 3.3 stars
33. When traveling in the Bermuda Triangle look danger square in the eye, avoid falling into the dreaded Trapezoid and that graveyard of the sea, the Wrecktangle. 3.0 stars
34. The plumber explained that the problem in my kitchen was just water under the fridge. 3.1 stars
35. Not only are you shortsighted, Toulouse-Lautrec, you can't see the forest for the knees. 2.4 stars
36. Wally wasn't sure in which branch of the Army he wanted to serve, but he gravitated toward the paratroops. 2.4 stars
37. They were the quietest burglars in the history of New York City. The newspapers called them 'Criminal Mimes.' 3.1 stars
38. After having a knee dislocated and an elbow fractured in two barroom brawls Bradley should have learned to stay away from those joints. 3.5 stars
39. Here at my estate on Monteverdi I attempted a Liszt of classical composers but had to go Bach because I couldn't get a Handel on it. 3.3 stars
40. 'Good boy, good boy', the dog trainer muttered. 1.8 stars
41. Dreams of gold lead the gang to boron the safe at the chemical plant but when the copper arrived they felt out of their element and now they argon. 3.2 stars
42. Many years ago I had this crazy idea about writing a novel about the Civil War but then suddenly it was all gone with the wind. 3.0 stars
43. I saw this French movie on TV last night, I think it was about a few people who were less miserable than everybody else. 2.7 stars
44. As his little ships sailed on Christopher Columbus didn't tell his crew he felt constantly on edge. 3.2 stars
45. Some folks are revolted by, have resistance to and find shocking watt is charged in our ohms for the use of electric current. 2.9 stars
46. When I go to West Africa I'm Ghana make sure Togo to Mali and then I can say I've Benin Timbuktu. 3.5 stars
47. The little old woman who lived in a shoe wasn't the sole owner - there were strings attached. 3.8 stars
48. It's evergreen and related to the pine but has no cones - perhaps yew can tell me what conifer tree it is. 3.0 stars
49. Since Bruce got too close to the big blade at the saw mill he is no longer feeling chipper. 3.1 stars
50. Dr. Heimlich manoeuvred through the traffic choke-point near San Juan Capistrano and waited expectantly for a swallow. 2.8 stars
51. The pirate captain's list was to starboard when he failed to ketch his bottle of port which fell onto the poop deck after he nearly keeled over. 2.5 stars
52. The geologist turned bank robber had lost his marbles when he swore the missing bank deposits were not his fault and he had a clean slate. 3.0 stars
53. The runaway beer truck barrelled down the freeway after its driver was mugged. 3.3 stars
54. Opening a new funeral parlor can be quite an undertaking. 3.6 stars
55. The cowboy dismounted on the spur of the moment to stirrup some trouble, bridled at being arrested and saddled the sheriff with a bit of a problem. 3.4 stars
56. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall - and a pretty good spring and summer, too. 3.6 stars
57. When the lumberjack accidentally let his chainsaw slip he quickly became lacked toes intolerant. 3.3 stars
58. I'll never forget that rainstorm near Los Angeles and how the rain came down in Torrance. 3.1 stars
59. The reason for the mysterious fog near Cape Cod is hazy but when it disappears it won't be mist. 3.6 stars
60. Soon after Sir Lancelot moved to Egypt he opened his very successful Used Camel Lot. 3.4 stars
61. I'm going to the guillotine at dawn and my wife has already collected my severance pay. 3.2 stars
62. In Egypt archaeologists pyramid the ruins for mummies and those places where ancient wrappers performed. 2.8 stars
63. Jenny was sure she was going to Heaven but she wouldn't harp on it. 2.7 stars
64. You're telling me that's an alligator? That's a croc! 3.1 stars
65. Little Jimmy told his teacher he never saw a humming bird but he had watched a spelling bee. 3.6 stars
66. It's no wonder that some baseball players have lots of money - often even many of the bases are loaded. 2.5 stars
67. When the pirate captain's ship ran aground he couldn't fathom why. 3.1 stars
68. Old calendars are outdated. 2.9 stars
69. After Gus gave his girlfriend a 3 dollar box of chocolates for her birthday he got nothing but snickers. 3.1 stars
70. Many folks have known about the plight of the spotted owl but never gave a hoot about it. 3.3 stars
71. One of the first things you'll notice at the Beijing airport is a whole lot of Chinese checkers. 3.4 stars
72. The number of kangaroos and wallabies meant for the new wildlife enclosure grew by leaps and bounds. 3.5 stars
73. When I asked if I could get insurance if the nearby volcano erupted they assured me I would be covered. 3.5 stars
74. The sun was bright on a dry, cloudless morning, but later it waned. 2.6 stars
75. When the first telephone rang it was Alexander Graham's bell. 3.0 stars
76. When Wally discovered he had Lyme disease he was really ticked off. 3.4 stars
77. I can't recall the last time I did any running, but I've been jogging my memory. 3.2 stars
78. Changing a tire on that crazy Houston freeway was a wrenching experience. 2.8 stars
79. Highways today are much better than they were many years ago and there are lots of concrete examples of it. 3.1 stars
80. After a night out on the town the wine-drinking pirate captain had a port list. 2.7 stars
81. The bowling alley employees went on strike when their boss said he couldn't spare them a raise in pay. 3.1 stars
82. Junior loved being a member of the wrestling team even though he was prone to lose. 2.4 stars
83. Some scientists who study our genes are so busy they do it on the fly. 2.8 stars
84. One evening King Arthur's men discovered Sir Lancelot's moonshine whiskey operation and shattered the still of the knight. 3.2 stars
85. 'We've lost too much to the Indian princess at that card game,' declared Capt. John Smith, 'but don't let poker haunt us.'. 3.5 stars
86. During an earthquake in California a bank went into default. 3.5 stars
87. When bungee jumping never ask anyone to cut you some slack. 3.5 stars
88. If you're looking for a fish that's good to eat you can't beat a drum. 2.3 stars
89. Isn't it strange that Sitting Bull fought at Custer's Last Stand? 2.5 stars
90. The little green men told me it was the Dog Star. I told them they can't be Sirius. 3.2 stars
91. Wally wanted a career with a big hamburger chain but he got into a pickle when he couldn't cut the mustard. 3.1 stars
92. Any lawyer will tell you that affidavit is better than none at all. 2.6 stars
93. 'Not only was I stumped,' said the lumberjack, 'but I was barking up the wrong tree.' 3.5 stars
94. It's only fitting that it's tailors who pull the wool over our eyes. 2.6 stars
95. Juneau Alaska? It's up there next to Canada, Yukon see it on a map, so it's not just an Aleutian. 2.8 stars
96. After Junior swallowed the watch he had to wait to pass the time. 3.5 stars
97. Marie Antoinette said that feeding the peasants was a piece of cake. 2.7 stars
98. Many descendants of early Mexicans have the kinds of jobs one would expect - as techs. 3.0 stars
99. Most males in a men's room are stand-up guys. 3.1 stars
100. Do the people who climb the world's highest mountain ever rest? 3.6 stars
101. Ever since Molly moved to Montana she wanted a shiny new kitchen with chrome on the range. 3.0 stars