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Listing puns for Hyla Hope Harder

1. The bakery was so wrapped up in decorating for Christmas that they even decorated their website's cookies. 3.0 stars
2. Once there was a Scottish thief who stole only valuable, antique tartans. When he was arrested, he plaid guilty. 2.8 stars
3. My cousin Henry loves automotive history. He never gets tired of studying it. He gets Benz out of shape if you say his hobby is a waste of time. It occupies his every spare moment. 1.7 stars
4. I am writing a term paper on various types of golf courses. I have found many links on the computer. 2.7 stars
5. The dermatologist loved to cook. He made everything from scratch. 1.7 stars
6. When the tree surgeon and his girlfriend broke up, he pined for her for months. Knock on wood, they will someday get back together. 2.1 stars
7. My sister fell in love with a circus trapeze artist. At first, we all thought she was attracted to his net worth, but she said it was his gravity-defying leaps of thought. They are both flying high now. 1.8 stars
8. My church has a well-respected bell choir. I started to audition for it but the long practice sessions did not appeal to me. I am sorry now I did not inquire more about it out because now my chance is gong forever. 1.7 stars
9. What is a shoe repairman's favorite dessert? Cobbler. 3.2 stars
10. Exterminators never die - they are just gnat seen anymore. 2.0 stars
11. What is the most romantic fruit? Dates. 2.9 stars
12. The barista earned latte good tips. 2.3 stars
13. Old English teachers never die - they just parse away. 3.0 stars
14. What do you call the medical condition where your feet go to sleep? Coma-toes. 4.0 stars
15. At the annual Anglo-Saxon Fair, I did not drink any wassail. I did not feel any mead for it. 2.0 stars
16. Why did the lumberjack lose his job? He axed too many questions. 3.1 stars
17. The neurologist wanted to propose to his girl friend, but he just didn't have the nerve. 3.0 stars
18. Why are brain surgeons ambitious? They want to get a head. 2.9 stars
19. Canus Major was the original alpha dog. 2.4 stars
20. The high school music teacher was quite controversial. He told his students to read band books. 3.4 stars
21. In ancient Egypt, papyrus farmers taught people the importance of reeding. 3.5 stars
22. The admiral's motto was, 'Do it schooner, not later!' 3.0 stars
23. The student had such a big assignment, he had to burn his kindle at both ends. 3.4 stars
24. My trip to the Grand Canyon cost a hole lot of money and gorged my bank account butte it was worth it! 3.1 stars
25. To use a computer to prospect for gold, you need to downlode. 2.7 stars
26. The optometrist ran for mayor because he was a visionary. 3.2 stars
27. What does a king eat while on his throne? Soup of the dais. 2.4 stars
28. The lumberjack loved his new computer. He especially enjoyed logging in. 3.9 stars
29. An heir is someone with a descent wage. 2.8 stars
30. When the statistics professor and the math professor wrote a cookbook together, they called it 'Pi A La Mode.' 3.4 stars
31. The linen shop gave their employees free bedding. Even their accountant had his own handmade spread sheet. 3.2 stars
32. The geneticist taught his students how to mendel defective genes. 2.5 stars
33. What part of the United States produces the largest number of cardiologists? The heartland. 3.1 stars
34. Motel operators never die, they just check out. 3.3 stars
35. The dermatologist was an avid gardener but he had a problem with moles. 3.3 stars
36. The roulette dealer had a unique personality. He had a different spin on everything. 3.2 stars
37. The pilot was a loner but even for him flying a drone was just too remote. 3.0 stars
38. The international jewel thieves were hard to catch because they had a good ring leader. 3.4 stars
39. When the snake charmer wanted to get dressed up, she put on an extra garter. 3.1 stars
40. The hotel chef was noted for his tomfoolery and his capers. 2.6 stars
41. The concert violinist believed in exercise, consequently, he was fit as a fiddle. 3.6 stars
42. The baseball pitcher's personality needed some polish. He was a diamond in the rough. 2.9 stars
43. Shopaholics never die, they just sale away. 3.7 stars
44. Old pianists never die, they just adagio away. 2.2 stars
45. The mother kangaroo tried to instill good financial habits in her baby. She told him to pocket all his allowance. 2.8 stars
46. The two pianists had a good marriage. They always were in a chord. 3.6 stars
47. Soup operas were the big winners at the Cans Film Festival. 3.1 stars
48. The humorist's favorite sandwich was smoked tongue on wry. 3.2 stars
49. As usual, the chief meteorologist blustered his way through the staff meeting. 2.4 stars
50. The portrait artist made extra money as a census taker. He was good at canvasing people. 3.4 stars
51. The grammarian was very logical. He had a lot of comma sense. 3.4 stars
52. The landscaper thought gardening magazines were fun to leaf through. 3.2 stars
53. The soprano was very optimistic and always left her friends on a high note. 3.2 stars
54. Due to inclement weather, the sandwich shop wrapped up early Tuesday night. 3.1 stars
55. When I went to the International Club, I accidentally spilled coffee on a Hindu lady's dress. I told her I was very sari. 3.0 stars
56. The ophthalmologist was called to testify because he was the only eye witness. 3.6 stars
57. The two geologists lived only a stone's throw apart. 3.0 stars
58. When the Dalmatian ran away, he was spotted two blocks from home. 3.7 stars
59. The church choir robes were too long and needed to be hymned. 3.4 stars
60. Every November, Mark, a member of MENSA, wishes his peers 'Happy Thinksgiving!' 2.2 stars