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Listing puns for Joseph Leff



1. A copier is a shared berth. 1.3 stars
2. Antelope is opposed to jogging. 2.6 stars
3. A logging site is a chopping center. 2.9 stars
4. Pathologists seldom get lost. 3.2 stars
5. A military alcoholic drink is a mug of war. 1.6 stars
6. A donation is a country full of money. 2.5 stars
7. A jungle gym is where gorillas play. 2.2 stars
8. A bookkeeper is a problem for a library. 3.6 stars
9. An angry skunk will reek its vengeance. 3.1 stars
10. Dieting fraud is high weigh robbery. 3.1 stars
11. A couch is a remote location. 3.3 stars
12. A usurer takes lots of interest in his work. 3.1 stars
13. Paratroopers pull strings to stay on the job. 4.0 stars
14. A surgeon's income is severance pay. 2.7 stars
15. A food fight is roll playing. 2.5 stars
16. A head-hunter is a safari leader. 2.4 stars
17. Provision means to favor sight. 1.8 stars
18. Forgery is why some citizens get notices to appear at a courthouse. 1.9 stars
19. A giggle is a small job for musicians. 2.5 stars
20. Loading is a small dent in the bottom of a car. 1.5 stars
21. Livelihood is an energetic gangster. 2.2 stars
22. A comfortable thief takes things easy. 3.0 stars
23. An anesthesiologist is a real knock-out. 3.1 stars
24. Everybody is the goal of a small-town mortician. 2.6 stars
25. A bad resume is a hire extinguisher. 3.6 stars
26. Dr. Frankenstein's lab was a recreation room. 3.4 stars
27. Con game money is the grift of the grab. 2.2 stars
28. Sawbones is what happened when the doctor looked at the X-ray. 2.6 stars
29. Installing auto mufflers is exhausting work. 3.6 stars
30. A hydrologist has a high-pressure job. 2.7 stars
31. Procure is used to heal a professional. 1.8 stars
32. A solitary farmer is a lone granger. 3.0 stars
33. A ghoul that dines on kangaroos is a hop goblin. 1.9 stars
34. Divers work under pressure. 3.2 stars
35. An acupuncturist keeps you on pins and needles. 2.8 stars
36. A graveyard shift is a cemetery in an earthquake. 2.7 stars
37. Lifelong counterfeiters never make any real money. 3.6 stars
38. A rabbit's warren is a hare craft. 1.5 stars
39. Pigs flying is an example of swine flew. 3.9 stars
40. Merchants are sung by a mermaid choir. 1.7 stars
41. Feather dusters are used to clean parakeets. 1.7 stars
42. A drummer who became a policeman was pounding a beat. 3.1 stars
43. The life of a lens maker is a real grind. 3.0 stars
44. Circus dogs fly through the air with the greatest of fleas. 2.7 stars
45. A croquette is a flirtatious female frog. 2.8 stars
46. A chiropractor is a lumbar jack. 3.5 stars
47. Taxidermy is a job for stuffy people. 3.9 stars
48. A university is a city in outer space. 2.8 stars
49. Bringing home very little net pay is the sign of a good trapeze acrobat. 2.5 stars
50. Watchdogs are covered with ticks. 2.9 stars
51. Shirts are pressed for cash. 2.9 stars
52. A skunk breeder is a person of phew words. 3.6 stars
53. A harbor master is in charge of berth control. 3.3 stars
54. A cowbell is what you call a lovely Southern cow. 2.5 stars
55. When the dog swallowed a bell, his bark began pealing. 1.9 stars
56. Pay for irony is wry bread. 1.9 stars
57. Notary means insufficiently ventilated. 1.6 stars
58. A storyteller is a gossipy bank employee. 2.3 stars
59. The Ferris wheel inventor is the father of the ride. 1.9 stars
60. A seal has a ball at the circus. 2.7 stars
61. Oncology is the study of car horns. 1.7 stars
62. Lungs are a pair of windbags. 2.1 stars
63. Seamstress is caused by wearing tight clothing. 3.3 stars
64. An angry skunk reeks his vengeance. 3.6 stars
65. A red blood count is a communist vampire. 2.7 stars
66. Santa came down with the flue. 2.8 stars
67. Australian beer-brewers use kangaroo hops. 2.8 stars
68. Deciding what Christmas gifts to give makes one present tense. 3.0 stars
69. A contest between church choirs is the battle of the choral see. 2.3 stars
70. Driving while using a cell phone is veer-inspiring. 1.5 stars
71. Sainthood is a gangster who truly repented. 2.3 stars
72. An umbilical cord is a navel vessel. 3.2 stars
73. A golf course is a foreground. 2.5 stars
74. A dermatologist is a flesh man. 1.6 stars
75. Bookkeepers are problems for libraries. 3.1 stars
76. Labyrinths are amazing. 3.3 stars
77. Marie was curious about radium. 1.8 stars
78. Religious vultures prey for their food. 3.4 stars
79. High school grammar books are parse for the course. 2.1 stars
80. A butter is an angry goat. 2.5 stars
81. Bring about is what a boxing promoter does. 2.4 stars
82. Spoilsport is the harbor where booty is shipped in. 2.0 stars
83. A funny criminal is a silicon. 3.1 stars
84. A novice skier often jumps to contusions. 3.1 stars
85. Crosswords are what you hear when you distract someone working on a puzzle. 3.4 stars
86. A taxidermist specializes in skin for cabs. 1.7 stars
87. Attire goes on a wheel. 2.7 stars
88. When a female sheep turns around and goes the other way it makes a ewe turn. 3.9 stars
89. A synthesis is an essay about transgressions. 1.8 stars
90. Valentine's Day is pure cupidity. 2.3 stars
91. A TV repairman's job is to get set to work. 2.0 stars
92. To vulcanize is to become like Spock. 1.9 stars
93. You use a lumberjack when your tree is flat. 2.7 stars
94. Tire stores are highway rubbery. 3.0 stars
95. When the gastroenterologist retired, he threw in the bowel. 2.7 stars
96. Some Missouri home designers are Ozark-itects. 1.9 stars
97. A locksmith is a key employee. 3.8 stars
98. Labor contracts come just before childbirth. 2.6 stars
99. A sewer is a tailor. 1.6 stars
100. Lamp factories have light workloads. 3.6 stars
101. CPR is a near-breath experience. 3.0 stars
102. Accountant is a royal insect. 2.4 stars
103. A surgeon's comments are incisive remarks. 3.3 stars
104. Iamb a poet. 2.5 stars
105. Carrot is auto rust. 1.6 stars
106. Vampires use must use mouthwash because they have bat breath. 2.7 stars
107. Resale means to go yachting again. 1.9 stars
108. The purpose of the IT Service Department is to be a customer-server. 2.0 stars
109. Overworked physicists put too many ions in the fire. 3.3 stars
110. 'We've got the best marriage' is a hitching boast. 2.0 stars
111. Seesaw is how you find a woodcutter. 1.8 stars
112. Doctors send patients to pool halls to find remarkable cuers. 2.3 stars
113. A sports coat worn on a hike is a trailblazer. 3.8 stars
114. Sailing is like oil drilling because they're both crewed businesses. 3.0 stars
115. Ash Wednesday follows Volcanic Tuesday. 2.8 stars
116. A Valentine's Day card is a hearty note. 2.6 stars
117. Art theft is a haul of frames. 3.1 stars
118. Eating oysters can help you increase your mussel tone. 3.5 stars
119. A hurricane is a stick used to encourage speed. 2.7 stars
120. A ship's captain is a sails manager. 3.4 stars
121. Parking - an average sovereign. 2.3 stars
122. The third degree is a diploma for successful criminals. 2.9 stars
123. An egg pulls a cart with a yolk. 2.4 stars
124. A yak is the star of an animal talk show. 3.0 stars
125. A mosquito is the oldest known skin-diver. 3.0 stars
126. The home for rich squirrels is The Nutcracker Suite. 3.5 stars
127. An avionics warning is a flier alarm. 2.7 stars
128. Digest is morbid humor. 1.8 stars
129. An embrace at a nudist colony is a bare hug. 3.4 stars
130. An instructor at an ice cream parlor is a sundae school teacher. 3.6 stars
131. People who listen to long political speeches are bulldozers. 3.3 stars
132. When the Aztec warrior was about to be punished severely, he was so sad he was disheartened. 2.8 stars
133. A weeknight is a tiny nobleman. 2.7 stars
134. Some doting parents are son worshipers. 2.8 stars
135. A summer is a mathematician. 2.5 stars
136. When the town removed billboards, they told people that's how it was designed. 2.8 stars
137. When a woman returns new clothing, that's post traumatic dress syndrome. 3.2 stars
138. A cannonball is a party for artillerymen. 3.2 stars
139. The land where movies are made is called reel estate. 3.1 stars
140. Surprises is the knight in charge of awards. 2.3 stars
141. 'Because' is a word to the whys. 3.6 stars
142. A no-fly zone prohibits zippers. 3.4 stars
143. Rental agents offer quarters for dollars. 3.5 stars
144. A harp that was shaved is a bare-faced lyre. 3.0 stars
145. A shotgun is an exhausted rifle. 2.6 stars
146. Historians have extra-century perception. 3.7 stars
147. Was Noel Coward afraid of traditional Christmas music? 2.9 stars
148. Cows make noise only when they're in the mood. 3.2 stars
149. Short-order cooks in busy restaurants call themselves 'pressure cookers'. 3.2 stars
150. The patient decided against an organ transplant. Instead, he changed his mind. 3.3 stars
151. When the head of the consulting team suggested that the canal around the castle be filled up with cement, he was demoted. 3.8 stars
152. A glide-path is a soar spot. 2.9 stars
153. A funeral ship is a sea hearse. 3.1 stars
154. The word 'ovine' means just like ewe. 2.9 stars
155. People who teach drivers' education are roads scholars. 3.3 stars
156. With Iowa crows swearing all over the places, the result was statewide caw cusses. 3.3 stars
157. The hoarfrost that forms on a daycare center's windows is called nursery rime. 3.0 stars
158. Dental care in Panama is called a route canal. 3.4 stars
159. The people who are predicting when all time will halt are known as endochronologists. 3.0 stars
160. The chiropractic author wrote a spinal column. 3.1 stars
161. When the church relocated it had an organ transplant. 3.6 stars
162. The place to trade dresses is called a frock exchange. 2.7 stars
163. A crow is a four-letter bird. 2.5 stars
164. Mathematicians are sum worshippers. 3.1 stars
165. A trick-or-treat route is a fright path. 2.3 stars
166. The fastest, most efficient way to make Halloween costumes is mask production. 3.0 stars
167. The cheap hotel was really a violin. 1.7 stars
168. Optometrists live long because they dilate. 3.8 stars