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Listing puns for Joseph Leff



1. A whirligig is a rock band playing in a helicopter. 2.3 stars
2. A completed jigsaw puzzle is a pieceful solution. 3.8 stars
3. A groundhog is the guy who drank all his coffee. 2.0 stars
4. A craftsman is a sailor. 1.8 stars
5. An excited stag runs for deer life. 3.6 stars
6. Bank robbery is a safe job. 3.5 stars
7. A timber wolf is an animal with wooden legs. 1.7 stars
8. An apron trade is a smock exchange. 2.2 stars
9. A donkey opens the godfather's door. 1.8 stars
10. A queue at a haunted house is a line of fright. 1.8 stars
11. A play place is a stage. 1.6 stars
12. Ivory soap is used by an elephant to clean its tusks. 2.2 stars
13. A staff member is a musical note. 2.1 stars
14. An acupuncturist is a pin doctor. 2.0 stars
15. A job application is when you must spell each word write. 1.8 stars
16. A female skunk is a stinker belle. 3.0 stars
17. A kidney is a young goat's leg joint. 3.3 stars
18. Woodcraft is a log canoe. 1.6 stars
19. An easy jailbreak is a slip of the pen. 3.0 stars
20. A copier is a shared berth. 1.3 stars
21. Antelope is opposed to jogging. 2.6 stars
22. A logging site is a chopping center. 2.9 stars
23. Pathologists seldom get lost. 3.2 stars
24. A military alcoholic drink is a mug of war. 1.6 stars
25. A donation is a country full of money. 2.5 stars
26. A jungle gym is where gorillas play. 2.2 stars
27. A bookkeeper is a problem for a library. 3.6 stars
28. An angry skunk will reek its vengeance. 3.1 stars
29. Dieting fraud is high weigh robbery. 3.1 stars
30. A couch is a remote location. 3.3 stars
31. A usurer takes lots of interest in his work. 3.1 stars
32. Paratroopers pull strings to stay on the job. 4.0 stars
33. A surgeon's income is severance pay. 2.7 stars
34. A food fight is roll playing. 2.5 stars
35. A head-hunter is a safari leader. 2.4 stars
36. Provision means to favor sight. 1.8 stars
37. Forgery is why some citizens get notices to appear at a courthouse. 1.9 stars
38. A giggle is a small job for musicians. 2.5 stars
39. Loading is a small dent in the bottom of a car. 1.5 stars
40. Livelihood is an energetic gangster. 2.2 stars
41. A comfortable thief takes things easy. 3.0 stars
42. An anesthesiologist is a real knock-out. 3.1 stars
43. Everybody is the goal of a small-town mortician. 2.6 stars
44. A bad resume is a hire extinguisher. 3.6 stars
45. Dr. Frankenstein's lab was a recreation room. 3.4 stars
46. Con game money is the grift of the grab. 2.2 stars
47. Sawbones is what happened when the doctor looked at the X-ray. 2.6 stars
48. Installing auto mufflers is exhausting work. 3.6 stars
49. A hydrologist has a high-pressure job. 2.7 stars
50. Procure is used to heal a professional. 1.8 stars
51. A solitary farmer is a lone granger. 3.0 stars
52. A ghoul that dines on kangaroos is a hop goblin. 1.9 stars
53. Divers work under pressure. 3.2 stars
54. An acupuncturist keeps you on pins and needles. 2.8 stars
55. A graveyard shift is a cemetery in an earthquake. 2.7 stars
56. Lifelong counterfeiters never make any real money. 3.6 stars
57. A rabbit's warren is a hare craft. 1.5 stars
58. Pigs flying is an example of swine flew. 3.9 stars
59. Merchants are sung by a mermaid choir. 1.7 stars
60. Feather dusters are used to clean parakeets. 1.7 stars
61. A drummer who became a policeman was pounding a beat. 3.1 stars
62. The life of a lens maker is a real grind. 3.0 stars
63. Circus dogs fly through the air with the greatest of fleas. 2.7 stars
64. A croquette is a flirtatious female frog. 2.8 stars
65. A chiropractor is a lumbar jack. 3.5 stars
66. Taxidermy is a job for stuffy people. 3.9 stars
67. A university is a city in outer space. 2.8 stars
68. Bringing home very little net pay is the sign of a good trapeze acrobat. 2.5 stars
69. Watchdogs are covered with ticks. 2.9 stars
70. Shirts are pressed for cash. 2.9 stars
71. A skunk breeder is a person of phew words. 3.6 stars
72. A harbor master is in charge of berth control. 3.3 stars
73. A cowbell is what you call a lovely Southern cow. 2.5 stars
74. When the dog swallowed a bell, his bark began pealing. 1.9 stars
75. Pay for irony is wry bread. 1.9 stars
76. Notary means insufficiently ventilated. 1.6 stars
77. A storyteller is a gossipy bank employee. 2.3 stars
78. The Ferris wheel inventor is the father of the ride. 1.9 stars
79. A seal has a ball at the circus. 2.7 stars
80. Oncology is the study of car horns. 1.7 stars
81. Lungs are a pair of windbags. 2.0 stars
82. Seamstress is caused by wearing tight clothing. 3.3 stars
83. An angry skunk reeks his vengeance. 3.6 stars
84. A red blood count is a communist vampire. 2.7 stars
85. Santa came down with the flue. 2.8 stars
86. Australian beer-brewers use kangaroo hops. 2.8 stars
87. Deciding what Christmas gifts to give makes one present tense. 3.0 stars
88. A contest between church choirs is the battle of the choral see. 2.3 stars
89. Driving while using a cell phone is veer-inspiring. 1.5 stars
90. Sainthood is a gangster who truly repented. 2.3 stars
91. An umbilical cord is a navel vessel. 3.2 stars
92. A golf course is a foreground. 2.5 stars
93. A dermatologist is a flesh man. 1.6 stars
94. Bookkeepers are problems for libraries. 3.1 stars
95. Labyrinths are amazing. 3.3 stars
96. Marie was curious about radium. 1.8 stars
97. Religious vultures prey for their food. 3.4 stars
98. High school grammar books are parse for the course. 2.1 stars
99. A butter is an angry goat. 2.5 stars
100. Bring about is what a boxing promoter does. 2.4 stars
101. Spoilsport is the harbor where booty is shipped in. 2.1 stars
102. A funny criminal is a silicon. 3.1 stars
103. A novice skier often jumps to contusions. 3.1 stars
104. Crosswords are what you hear when you distract someone working on a puzzle. 3.4 stars
105. A taxidermist specializes in skin for cabs. 1.7 stars
106. Attire goes on a wheel. 2.7 stars
107. When a female sheep turns around and goes the other way it makes a ewe turn. 3.9 stars
108. A synthesis is an essay about transgressions. 1.8 stars
109. Valentine's Day is pure cupidity. 2.4 stars
110. A TV repairman's job is to get set to work. 2.0 stars
111. To vulcanize is to become like Spock. 1.9 stars
112. You use a lumberjack when your tree is flat. 2.7 stars
113. Tire stores are highway rubbery. 3.0 stars
114. When the gastroenterologist retired, he threw in the bowel. 2.7 stars
115. Some Missouri home designers are Ozark-itects. 1.9 stars
116. A locksmith is a key employee. 3.7 stars
117. Labor contracts come just before childbirth. 2.6 stars
118. A sewer is a tailor. 1.6 stars
119. Lamp factories have light workloads. 3.6 stars
120. CPR is a near-breath experience. 3.0 stars
121. Accountant is a royal insect. 2.4 stars
122. A surgeon's comments are incisive remarks. 3.3 stars
123. Iamb a poet. 2.5 stars
124. Carrot is auto rust. 1.7 stars
125. Vampires use must use mouthwash because they have bat breath. 2.7 stars
126. Resale means to go yachting again. 1.9 stars
127. The purpose of the IT Service Department is to be a customer-server. 2.0 stars
128. Overworked physicists put too many ions in the fire. 3.3 stars
129. 'We've got the best marriage' is a hitching boast. 2.0 stars
130. Seesaw is how you find a woodcutter. 1.8 stars
131. Doctors send patients to pool halls to find remarkable cuers. 2.3 stars
132. A sports coat worn on a hike is a trailblazer. 3.8 stars
133. Sailing is like oil drilling because they're both crewed businesses. 3.0 stars
134. Ash Wednesday follows Volcanic Tuesday. 2.8 stars
135. A Valentine's Day card is a hearty note. 2.6 stars
136. Art theft is a haul of frames. 3.1 stars
137. Eating oysters can help you increase your mussel tone. 3.5 stars
138. A hurricane is a stick used to encourage speed. 2.7 stars
139. A ship's captain is a sails manager. 3.4 stars
140. Parking - an average sovereign. 2.3 stars
141. The third degree is a diploma for successful criminals. 2.9 stars
142. An egg pulls a cart with a yolk. 2.4 stars
143. A yak is the star of an animal talk show. 3.0 stars
144. A mosquito is the oldest known skin-diver. 3.0 stars
145. The home for rich squirrels is The Nutcracker Suite. 3.5 stars
146. An avionics warning is a flier alarm. 2.7 stars
147. Digest is morbid humor. 1.8 stars
148. An embrace at a nudist colony is a bare hug. 3.4 stars
149. An instructor at an ice cream parlor is a sundae school teacher. 3.6 stars
150. People who listen to long political speeches are bulldozers. 3.3 stars
151. When the Aztec warrior was about to be punished severely, he was so sad he was disheartened. 2.8 stars
152. A weeknight is a tiny nobleman. 2.7 stars
153. Some doting parents are son worshipers. 2.8 stars
154. A summer is a mathematician. 2.4 stars
155. When the town removed billboards, they told people that's how it was designed. 2.8 stars
156. When a woman returns new clothing, that's post traumatic dress syndrome. 3.2 stars
157. A cannonball is a party for artillerymen. 3.2 stars
158. The land where movies are made is called reel estate. 3.1 stars
159. Surprises is the knight in charge of awards. 2.3 stars
160. 'Because' is a word to the whys. 3.6 stars
161. A no-fly zone prohibits zippers. 3.4 stars
162. Rental agents offer quarters for dollars. 3.5 stars
163. A harp that was shaved is a bare-faced lyre. 3.0 stars
164. A shotgun is an exhausted rifle. 2.6 stars
165. Historians have extra-century perception. 3.7 stars
166. Was Noel Coward afraid of traditional Christmas music? 2.9 stars
167. Cows make noise only when they're in the mood. 3.2 stars
168. Short-order cooks in busy restaurants call themselves 'pressure cookers'. 3.2 stars
169. The patient decided against an organ transplant. Instead, he changed his mind. 3.3 stars
170. When the head of the consulting team suggested that the canal around the castle be filled up with cement, he was demoted. 3.8 stars
171. A glide-path is a soar spot. 3.0 stars
172. A funeral ship is a sea hearse. 3.1 stars
173. The word 'ovine' means just like ewe. 2.9 stars
174. People who teach drivers' education are roads scholars. 3.3 stars
175. With Iowa crows swearing all over the places, the result was statewide caw cusses. 3.3 stars
176. The hoarfrost that forms on a daycare center's windows is called nursery rime. 3.0 stars
177. Dental care in Panama is called a route canal. 3.4 stars
178. The people who are predicting when all time will halt are known as endochronologists. 3.0 stars
179. The chiropractic author wrote a spinal column. 3.1 stars
180. When the church relocated it had an organ transplant. 3.6 stars
181. The place to trade dresses is called a frock exchange. 2.7 stars
182. A crow is a four-letter bird. 2.5 stars
183. Mathematicians are sum worshippers. 3.1 stars
184. A trick-or-treat route is a fright path. 2.3 stars
185. The fastest, most efficient way to make Halloween costumes is mask production. 3.0 stars
186. The cheap hotel was really a violin. 1.7 stars
187. Optometrists live long because they dilate. 3.8 stars