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Listing puns for Joseph Leff



1. Livelihood is an energetic gangster. 3.0 stars
2. A comfortable thief takes things easy. 3.0 stars
3. An anesthesiologist is a real knock-out. 3.1 stars
4. Everybody is the goal of a small-town mortician. 2.5 stars
5. A bad resume is a hire extinguisher. 3.5 stars
6. Dr. Frankenstein's lab was a recreation room. 3.3 stars
7. Con game money is the grift of the grab. 2.2 stars
8. Sawbones is what happened when the doctor looked at the X-ray. 2.6 stars
9. Installing auto mufflers is exhausting work. 3.6 stars
10. A hydrologist has a high-pressure job. 2.7 stars
11. Procure is used to heal a professional. 1.8 stars
12. A solitary farmer is a lone granger. 3.0 stars
13. A ghoul that dines on kangaroos is a hop goblin. 1.9 stars
14. Divers work under pressure. 3.2 stars
15. An acupuncturist keeps you on pins and needles. 2.7 stars
16. A graveyard shift is a cemetery in an earthquake. 2.7 stars
17. Lifelong counterfeiters never make any real money. 3.6 stars
18. A rabbit's warren is a hare craft. 1.5 stars
19. Pigs flying is an example of swine flew. 3.9 stars
20. Merchants are sung by a mermaid choir. 1.6 stars
21. Feather dusters are used to clean parakeets. 1.7 stars
22. A drummer who became a policeman was pounding a beat. 3.1 stars
23. The life of a lens maker is a real grind. 3.0 stars
24. Circus dogs fly through the air with the greatest of fleas. 2.7 stars
25. A croquette is a flirtatious female frog. 2.8 stars
26. A chiropractor is a lumbar jack. 3.5 stars
27. Taxidermy is a job for stuffy people. 3.9 stars
28. A university is a city in outer space. 2.8 stars
29. Bringing home very little net pay is the sign of a good trapeze acrobat. 2.5 stars
30. Watchdogs are covered with ticks. 2.9 stars
31. Shirts are pressed for cash. 2.9 stars
32. A skunk breeder is a person of phew words. 3.6 stars
33. A harbor master is in charge of berth control. 3.4 stars
34. A cowbell is what you call a lovely Southern cow. 2.5 stars
35. When the dog swallowed a bell, his bark began pealing. 1.9 stars
36. Pay for irony is wry bread. 1.9 stars
37. Notary means insufficiently ventilated. 1.6 stars
38. A storyteller is a gossipy bank employee. 2.3 stars
39. The Ferris wheel inventor is the father of the ride. 1.9 stars
40. A seal has a ball at the circus. 2.7 stars
41. Oncology is the study of car horns. 1.7 stars
42. Lungs are a pair of windbags. 2.1 stars
43. Seamstress is caused by wearing tight clothing. 3.3 stars
44. An angry skunk reeks his vengeance. 3.6 stars
45. A red blood count is a communist vampire. 2.7 stars
46. Santa came down with the flue. 2.8 stars
47. Australian beer-brewers use kangaroo hops. 2.8 stars
48. Deciding what Christmas gifts to give makes one present tense. 3.0 stars
49. A contest between church choirs is the battle of the choral see. 2.3 stars
50. Driving while using a cell phone is veer-inspiring. 1.5 stars
51. Sainthood is a gangster who truly repented. 2.3 stars
52. An umbilical cord is a navel vessel. 3.2 stars
53. A golf course is a foreground. 2.6 stars
54. A dermatologist is a flesh man. 1.6 stars
55. Bookkeepers are problems for libraries. 3.1 stars
56. Labyrinths are amazing. 3.3 stars
57. Marie was curious about radium. 1.8 stars
58. Religious vultures prey for their food. 3.4 stars
59. High school grammar books are parse for the course. 2.1 stars
60. A butter is an angry goat. 2.5 stars
61. Bring about is what a boxing promoter does. 2.4 stars
62. Spoilsport is the harbor where booty is shipped in. 2.0 stars
63. A funny criminal is a silicon. 3.1 stars
64. A novice skier often jumps to contusions. 3.1 stars
65. Crosswords are what you hear when you distract someone working on a puzzle. 3.4 stars
66. A taxidermist specializes in skin for cabs. 1.7 stars
67. Attire goes on a wheel. 2.7 stars
68. When a female sheep turns around and goes the other way it makes a ewe turn. 3.9 stars
69. A synthesis is an essay about transgressions. 1.8 stars
70. Valentine's Day is pure cupidity. 2.3 stars
71. A TV repairman's job is to get set to work. 2.0 stars
72. To vulcanize is to become like Spock. 1.9 stars
73. You use a lumberjack when your tree is flat. 2.7 stars
74. Tire stores are highway rubbery. 3.0 stars
75. When the gastroenterologist retired, he threw in the bowel. 2.7 stars
76. Some Missouri home designers are Ozark-itects. 1.9 stars
77. A locksmith is a key employee. 3.8 stars
78. Labor contracts come just before childbirth. 2.6 stars
79. A sewer is a tailor. 1.5 stars
80. Lamp factories have light workloads. 3.6 stars
81. CPR is a near-breath experience. 3.0 stars
82. Accountant is a royal insect. 2.4 stars
83. A surgeon's comments are incisive remarks. 3.3 stars
84. Iamb a poet. 2.5 stars
85. Carrot is auto rust. 1.6 stars
86. Vampires use must use mouthwash because they have bat breath. 2.7 stars
87. Resale means to go yachting again. 1.9 stars
88. The purpose of the IT Service Department is to be a customer-server. 2.0 stars
89. Overworked physicists put too many ions in the fire. 3.3 stars
90. 'We've got the best marriage' is a hitching boast. 2.0 stars
91. Seesaw is how you find a woodcutter. 1.8 stars
92. Doctors send patients to pool halls to find remarkable cuers. 2.3 stars
93. A sports coat worn on a hike is a trailblazer. 3.8 stars
94. Sailing is like oil drilling because they're both crewed businesses. 3.0 stars
95. Ash Wednesday follows Volcanic Tuesday. 2.7 stars
96. A Valentine's Day card is a hearty note. 2.6 stars
97. Art theft is a haul of frames. 3.1 stars
98. Eating oysters can help you increase your mussel tone. 3.5 stars
99. A hurricane is a stick used to encourage speed. 2.7 stars
100. A ship's captain is a sails manager. 3.4 stars
101. Parking - an average sovereign. 2.3 stars
102. The third degree is a diploma for successful criminals. 2.9 stars
103. An egg pulls a cart with a yolk. 2.4 stars
104. A yak is the star of an animal talk show. 3.0 stars
105. A mosquito is the oldest known skin-diver. 3.0 stars
106. The home for rich squirrels is The Nutcracker Suite. 3.5 stars
107. An avionics warning is a flier alarm. 2.7 stars
108. Digest is morbid humor. 1.8 stars
109. An embrace at a nudist colony is a bare hug. 3.4 stars
110. An instructor at an ice cream parlor is a sundae school teacher. 3.6 stars
111. People who listen to long political speeches are bulldozers. 3.3 stars
112. When the Aztec warrior was about to be punished severely, he was so sad he was disheartened. 2.8 stars
113. A weeknight is a tiny nobleman. 2.7 stars
114. Some doting parents are son worshipers. 2.8 stars
115. A summer is a mathematician. 2.5 stars
116. When the town removed billboards, they told people that's how it was designed. 2.8 stars
117. When a woman returns new clothing, that's post traumatic dress syndrome. 3.2 stars
118. A cannonball is a party for artillerymen. 3.2 stars
119. The land where movies are made is called reel estate. 3.1 stars
120. Surprises is the knight in charge of awards. 2.3 stars
121. 'Because' is a word to the whys. 3.6 stars
122. A no-fly zone prohibits zippers. 3.4 stars
123. Rental agents offer quarters for dollars. 3.5 stars
124. A harp that was shaved is a bare-faced lyre. 3.0 stars
125. A shotgun is an exhausted rifle. 2.6 stars
126. Historians have extra-century perception. 3.7 stars
127. Was Noel Coward afraid of traditional Christmas music? 2.9 stars
128. Cows make noise only when they're in the mood. 3.2 stars
129. Short-order cooks in busy restaurants call themselves 'pressure cookers'. 3.2 stars
130. The patient decided against an organ transplant. Instead, he changed his mind. 3.3 stars
131. When the head of the consulting team suggested that the canal around the castle be filled up with cement, he was demoted. 3.8 stars
132. A glide-path is a soar spot. 3.0 stars
133. A funeral ship is a sea hearse. 3.1 stars
134. The word 'ovine' means just like ewe. 2.9 stars
135. People who teach drivers' education are roads scholars. 3.3 stars
136. With Iowa crows swearing all over the places, the result was statewide caw cusses. 3.3 stars
137. The hoarfrost that forms on a daycare center's windows is called nursery rime. 3.0 stars
138. Dental care in Panama is called a route canal. 3.4 stars
139. The people who are predicting when all time will halt are known as endochronologists. 3.0 stars
140. The chiropractic author wrote a spinal column. 3.1 stars
141. When the church relocated it had an organ transplant. 3.6 stars
142. The place to trade dresses is called a frock exchange. 2.7 stars
143. A crow is a four-letter bird. 2.5 stars
144. Mathematicians are sum worshippers. 3.1 stars
145. A trick-or-treat route is a fright path. 2.3 stars
146. The fastest, most efficient way to make Halloween costumes is mask production. 3.0 stars
147. The cheap hotel was really a violin. 1.7 stars
148. Optometrists live long because they dilate. 3.7 stars