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matt mathews
Matt Mathews

1. Whenever I feel withdrawn, I call my bank to deposit my loose change. 1.8 stars
2. The organic herb farmer was accused of dilly dallying around by his wife Rosemary, when he spent too much thyme trying to become a sage. 2.9 stars
3. After spending all day grinding up tree bark and branches the worker was remarkably chipper afterwards. 3.3 stars
4. The water department staff said they would be fluid in answering all mystifying questions asked at a recent meeting. 2.2 stars
5. The chef said it would be rare moment if the waiter returned a steak with a burning issue after being so tender cooking it. 1.7 stars
6. During the Christmas shopping season the department store staff became bow legged after wrapping hundreds of gifts. 2.0 stars
7. The window company said it was pane full to reduce prices but they want to sill any deal possible. 2.9 stars
8. After the winter thaw, the entire neighborhood was able to start a slush fund for next year. 2.5 stars
9. Are people that live in both the Arctic and Antarctica called pollsters? 2.9 stars
10. The fruit farmer was plum happy he pruned his orchard last fall. 3.1 stars